When Charlotte called me about providing doula services, I was in a store, shopping for picture frames. I said that I would answer as many of her questions as I could, but that my phone was dying and I wasn't near my charger so in the event she was in the middle of asking me a really important question and my phone cut off, she'd have to call me back. We were able to finish our conversation and she ended with, "Anyhoo, I'd like to meet with 
you, if possible." I guessed that her use of the word, "anyhoo" and her desire to meet me, meant the conversation had gone well, despite my dying phone.
I met with Charlotte on a very cold Friday in January. She wanted to meet me in person since I had encouraged her to meet with several doulas to find the one that was best for her. By the end of our meeting, though, she was ready to hire me. Since she was due so soon, we ended up doing our prenatal visit right then and there and Charlotte let me know two important things: her husband wouldn't be there because he was in the army and her last labor was very long. We decided that another doula would be a good idea so that she would have at least two support people, so I asked Kelsey, my apprenctice, to attend the birth also.
Charlotte was due on February 7th. I told her I was holding a doula training that weekend but if she went into labor while I was teaching, we would make sure to have a back-up doula present. I was crossing my fingers that she would have her baby before or after the training because I was so excited to attend her birth.
Because of her previous experience, she had planned for a long, drawn out labor. What she hadn't realized, was that there were many medical interventions that contributed to this. When she called, on the afternoon of the 24th of January, she let me know she was having consistent contractions about 5 minutes apart, but was "sure it wasn't anything," as this was the same thing that happened in her last labor when she still had hours to go. I received another call from her a couple hours later and she had to stop several times in our conversation to concentrate and breathe through contractions. I asked her if she wanted me to come help her now, but she said she was fine and would call me when things got a little more difficult for her to handle alone. About four hours later, she called and said that she would like me to come to her house. I called Kelsey and grabbed the bag I had packed earlier with food, Charlotte's file and various other necessities. When I arrived, at about 8:30pm, Charlotte was on her knees, lying over the seat of a rocking chair, breathing slowly and not making a noise. When the contraction was over, she looked up at me and cheerfully said, "Hi." I smiled at her joyfulness, despite the challenging event she was experiencing. She told me she wanted to go to her friend's house to labor now, since it was close to the hospital. Kelsey and I grabbed her bags and helped her into her coat and shoes. We stepped out onto the porch and another contraction began. I wrapped my arms under her arms and she layed her head on me and sank into the contraction, gently swaying and breathing. When it was over, we walked to the car, taking one more contraction on the way before we got everyone settled. As I drove, Charlotte talked to me about and old apartment she and her husband had lived in when they were first married, how she had such good memories of the place and how she still really missed the neighborhood. Whenever she had a contraction, she just closed her eyes and breathed deeply and slowly. When the contractions were over, we continued with the conversation, as if it were just another day. As we got closer to her friend's house, I noticed that the contractions were coming closer now and told Charlotte that I was sure it wouldn't be too early to go to the hospital, but that it was of course, her decision. She said she preferred to go to her friend's house so we continued on. When we arrived I parked and asked her if she wanted me to leave her bags or bring them. She told me to bring them because she was probably going to end up spending the night. I had to chuckle a little at her denial of how far in labor she really was. We grabbed all the bags and proceeded to walk to the doorstep. It took a while, as we ended up doing many of the slow dancing contractions on our way there. Her friends were very gracious as they let us in. Charlotte was glad to have a couch to resume her favorite position of being on her knees and leaning over. After the second contraction in this position, she looked up and said, "Something just happened. I think my water broke." She quickly walked in to the bathroom where she confirmed that indeed her water had broken. I went in with her and helped her with some contractions that were now quite a bit more intense. Charlotte started using a deep moaning along with her breathing that really seemed to help. She decided it was time to go to the hospital so we lugged everything back into the car and again took several more slow dancing contractions on our way there. It only took us about 10 mintues to make the drive, but Charlotte's contractions were coming hard and fast, now. She used lots of deep moaning, but it was hard for her to sit in the seat in the car and as I drove, I talked her through while also trying to call the midwife to let her know we were on our way! When we were about half-way there, I heard a "catch" in Charlotte's voice as she was moaning. Every doula and midwife knows that the catch can be a sign that the mom's just about ready to push. In fact, that's precisely why there's a catch: her body is already beginning to start the pushing process and the strong surge can cause a pause in an otherwise smooth moan. I decided to abandon the phone call to the midwife and just drove. I told Charlotte that if she was pushing, I was pulling the car over. She said, "I'm not pushing!" astounded that I would say something so absurd. Later we would laugh at this. By the time we drove into the hospital parking lot, her contractions were practically right on top of one another. I made the decision to drive right up to the door and not park. Kelsey had parked and ran toward us as we slowly made our way through the doors. Three large security gaurds were standing there looking at us and I quickly blurted, "This woman is having a baby and I'm leaving my car there!" I jabbed my finger at the closing doors. One of the gaurds ran for a wheel chair, pushed the elevator button and called labor and delivery all while the other two looked on with their mouths open. Charlotte leaned against the counter there, while the gaurd with the wheel chair kept saying, "Sit down, sit down." Finally Kelsey said, "Thank you. She'll sit just as soon as she's done with this contraction." Now, just a note: we doulas hate it when people treat birth as an illness so we usually shun wheel chairs - the moms are strong enough to walk, and it's good for them, thank-you-very-much, but Charlotte's baby would have been born in the elevator if we didn't have wheels under her so we rushed her to the waiting elevator, pushed the button and waited until the slow contraption reached the third floor. The doors opened, we zoomed out and they buzzed us in. We drove straight past the check-in station and a sweet nurse led us into a room. Charlotte climbed out of the chair and onto the bed so the nurse could check her and proceeded to throw the hospital gown on the floor in the process. She chose to we
ar one of her husband's T-shirts. The nurse announced that she was six centimeters and Charlotte let out a frustrated groan and said, "I can't do it anymore! I can't do it, I can't do it!" I squatted down next to the bed and looked into her eyes and said, "Charlotte, you are progressing much faster than you think you are. Stick with it. Stay with me. Breathe with me. Look at me." Just then she started pushing and the nurse said, "Don't push, your cervix isn't complete yet!" Charlotte screamed, "I can't stop. It's doing it on it's own!" (A common phrase among mothers who have overwhelming urges to push). The nurse checked her, announced that she was at 8 centimeters, and ran to find someone to catch the baby. About two seconds later, they announced her at a 10 and the charge nurse came in with gloves on, ready to catch. A couple pushes later, and an unwrapping of the cord from around his neck - twice! - and sweet little Jack was born. The nurse guided him up onto Charlotte's bare chest and everyone took a collective sigh of relief. He was out!
All told, from the time we came through the doors of the hospital until the baby was out, was TEN MINUTES! Charlotte beamed and proceeded to talk to us for the next two hours as if we were at a garden party, using lots of "anyhoos" and other ecstatic language. We texted pictures to her happy husband and they talked for some time of the swiftness of events. She was full of energy, full of life and FULL of endorphins. She had used deep focus and relaxation, low moaning and deep breathing and had created, if not the birth she had envisioned, one that she felt was the very best for her and her baby.
We had such a great training! By the second day, I knew that the five participants were meant to be in this workshop together.
much from the sharing of life experiences, particularly those we had had with our own births and those of our families and friends. How wonderful it is to learn from your students!
